It was Beautiful when you played it out in my head

Maybe I’ll take a page out of your story mother

It was beautiful when you played it out in my head

 

Green backdrop

Sun shining

The smell of pine

Or maybe forest

The smell of bark

Aroma of nature

Because you were a wild woman

That wanted to be set free

 

Surrounded by only those you loved

Because who would travel out to the middle of nowhere

Except for the ones that loved you just as hard

 

Your dress

Flowing and crimson red

Because you were not the delicate white flower

That these occasions paint people to be

You were fire

Ignited by your love for life

Fueled by your love for laughter

You glowed bright

Because the last thing you ever wanted

Was to fade into the crowd

 

Diamonds embedded in white gold

Laid upon a bed of moss

Because satin pillows were too fragile

For the way you planned on spending your nights

 

I know you mother

You would of walked that path solo

To the man who held your heart

As we all gazed upon your beauty

 

But I, mother

I didn’t want to walk that isle lonely

I am not sure how I will face that day

I will be filled with happiness and love

But I will also be broken

How can I hand this man my heart?

He will feel the deception

He will feel it light

For it lost its fullness

When I lost you

 

How mother?

How will I have the strength

To put on that dress

The strength you had in crimson red

I will crack in eggshell white

 

How will I hear the echo of the song?

The song of a story that is about to begin

When all I will hear is a reminder

Of when the echo of your laughter

ceased to exist

 

I will imagine you there, mother

I will save you a seat

I will hold your hand

I will save you a dance, mother

Because that is all I can do

That’s all that I can

 

I will wear crimson upon my chest

To give me your strength

 

I will place the rainforest upon

My table tops to represent

Freedom

To represent

Life

 

I will surround myself with the people

I love

and the people that love me just as hard

 

I will fill my life with laughter

Because that is the only way I will be able

To keep you alive in my life

 

I will try not to taint every happy moment

with the sadness of my loss

 

I will try not to grey out every sunshine

With the rainclouds of my tears

 

But I don’t think my future chapters

Will ever be as bright, mother

I don’t think my story will ever be As beautiful

as the story you painted me

Because every chapter I write

from Now on

will be void of your presence

Will be void of you voice

Will be void of your smile

Will be void of a giant piece of me

 

 

 

 

 

 

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